By the time you read this, I will hopefully be out of surgery and heading home from NYU Medical Center. I'll probably have a report on that later this week. But I wanted to jot a few thoughts down beforehand (thank you, auto-post)...
The friend I had dinner with last week (doing the tasting menu at Ammo) introduced me to his late aunt a few years ago. She and I became quite friendly and bonded over theater and the arts. She was on my review list and she even took me to quite a few shows over the last few years. My friend told me that she left me her Encores subscription in her will, which is a bit overwhelming.
Anyway, I visited her over the summer, which turned out to be a few months before she died. She had a rare type of ovarian cancer, so we compared notes on surgery, doctors, treatments and other things. Even though I am obviously nowhere near as ill as she was, it was still nice to complain with someone who understood about the degrading aspects of tests and treatments, and the outrageous costs of everything. I felt so badly for her, because she was clearly so sick, but I also felt bad because she had no friends or family coming to visit or take care of her. She had to hire a nurse to help her out. She had two sisters, neither of whom came in to visit for extended periods of time. And I gathered from some of her comments that her friends were just uncomfortable and couldn't handle the long-term aspects of her illness. My friend (her nephew) lives in CA, so he came in a couple of times a month towards the end, but still, she spent major portions of her illness alone. That is so monumentally sad to me. Even if that was the way she wanted it.
Not only am I SO fortunate to not be as desperately ill as she was, but clearly I am outrageously thankful that I have so many friends and family members who would come to take care of me, at the drop of a hat, should I need them. My mom was a rock star in February, intending to stay for a week and ending up being here for close to a month; my sister came in (and spent lots of money she doesn't have) to meet my doctors so everyone back home could feel a little bit more comfortable about my care. My nephew wanted to visit immediately after to cheer me up. Even my team of doctors have my best interests at heart and never make me feel like 'just another patient.'
Every single loved one in my life has stepped up to the plate and gone above and beyond the call of friendship this year. No one can realize how much easier this terrible year has been with so much love and support holding me up. It even became apparent which friends were perhaps not worthy of as much time and attention as I had given them in the past. If I tried to share, and they managed to avoid (or never contact me again), it became clear to me that it is probably time to move on, as much as I hate to do that.
I pride myself on being a loyal and fierce friend--and this year my friends have put me to shame. I have a lot to live up to. And I am extremely thankful for that. I plan to spend 2012 and beyond showing everyone just how thankful for them I am.
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